We Can’t Love Them Perfectly
do you ever hate the way you feel about your children? find yourself wishing they were different? more acceptable? i used to think when i was imagining the most horrific sins, i should keep them to myself. that it was just me. the judgement on other’s faces proved so. i know better now. so, some of you are ashamedly nodding in agreement with the above questions.
as mothers, we ride a fine line between not bragging too much on our children and wanting to point out how wonderful and talented they are at the same time. in private, we critique them. we quickly push the thoughts out and pretend it didn’t happen because it devastates our hearts. we think: if I can’t love them perfectly, who can?
i’ve decided not to push the thoughts out, let god reckon with my heart. i’ve wept and repented and asked for my heart to be different. i’m reminded it’s the bent of my heart toward evil, but there is daily renewal for those who entrust their lives to him. he can love them perfectly because I can’t.
i sought the LORD and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears. those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame. Psalm 34: 4-5