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Treasure The One — A Guest Post

You cannot be in the presence of Diane Butler without shedding many tears — some from laughing — some from crying.  But mostly, you will not leave her company without first hearing the impact Jesus has had on her life.  Diane is sharing a powerful story today of anger, control, forgiveness, mercy and redemption. I hope many are set free as we continue to address the fear of coming clean.

Here is her story:

There is a memory that continues to remind me of the power of forgiveness and the power God gives us to overcome sin in our lives — my precious little two-year-old (now 12) sitting on the toilet.  We were in the middle of potty training, and she would not “go potty.”  My heart breaks as I share this because it is not a proud moment.  I just wanted her to go potty; I just remember “losing it.”  I can see her little face looking at me as I screamed at her to “just go potty!”  I began to rant and rave at this little innocent bystander to my lack of control.  This pattern of anger continued for many years.  When I couldn’t get the response I wanted, no one wanted to be in my path.

How do we hurt someone we treasure so much?  The object of our heart must be Christ. If we don’t treasure the One who teaches us to love, the one we substitute in His place will take the wrath of our disappointment.

I loved my children so much, but they were having to do God’s job.  They were having to make me feel loved, valued, accepted, respected, and when they didn’t, I let them know.  It breaks my heart to think about it now. But what allows me to share is that I’m different; I have changed the object of my treasure.  My treasure is Jesus!  He has set me free from depending on my children to complete me, and I can’t even begin to explain how my home has changed.  No one walks on eggshells anymore.  My home is different, not because of something I did but because God poured out his great mercy and forgiveness through his Son, Jesus Christ.  I am different because someone else had been transformed by Jesus, shared their story and through it, God revealed my sin to me.

I had known Jesus my whole life, but I refused to give him everything.  I was enslaved to what I wanted, and they were good things, but they were not the prize of Jesus Himself.  Because I was a slave to my lifestyle and my “stuff,” everyone else paid when life wasn’t going well for me.  At the center of my story was ME, and what I finally understood was that God had to be the center of my story.  Now, when my children disappoint me, I remember it’s not about me.  When they make a bad choice, I remember it’s not about me.  When they bring home a bad grade, I remember it’s not about me.  I am free to love them, teach them, train them, but it is not my job to control.

I have a long way to go, and God has had to heal a lot of wounds in my children and me, but he is faithful.

The sin was easy to hide; it didn’t happen in public.

It was something I often wrote off as this is just who I am.

That was a lie.

I am so thankful God never gives up on us.  Don’t hide in the shame of your sin.  Bring it into the light so you can be who God says you are.

What lie is your sin holding you to?

Who/What is taking the wrath of your disappointment?

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8 Comments Post a comment
  1. Such a great lesson Diane!

    January 18, 2012
  2. Tara #

    Thank you so much Diane! I love this line: “If we don’t treasure the One who teaches us to love, the one we substitute in His place will take the wrath of our disappointment.” So many times I catch myself falling back on my idols of acceptance and control. The thing that makes the anger come out in me the most, is when my house is a wreck. Unfortunately, a lot of times it’s my husband and kids that take the wrath when I am treasuring a clean home over Christ. I can so easily let a few dirty dishes or mounds of laundry dictate my emotions. Having a peaceful and clean home is not a bad thing in itself, but when I let that control me, then it becomes my idol. Thank you for this reminder today, that it’s not about me or what others think of me (and my clean or unclean house). I’m free in Christ.

    January 18, 2012
    • Thanks, Tara. I can certainly relate to the clean house issues. So, I’m purposely leaving dust for small group tonight to show that I can let things go, ok?

      January 18, 2012
  3. Wow! Thank you for sharing this Diane. I see myself in this post and I want to change!!! I don’t want to be the mommy that yells all the time! I don’t want to have a bad attitude about everything! I want Jesus to change me!!
    I take my anger out on my husband and my kids and that’s not fair. I pray for a new heart, because I have a broken one! It doesn’t work right, not like it should!

    Thank you for posting this, I know it wasn’t easy! Please pray for me as well!

    January 18, 2012
    • Angela, What’s even harder than confessing sin “after the fact” is confessing “in the middle.” Grace to you and your family. We will both be praying for you as you approach the throne and seek God for a changed heart. His Spirit will give you the strength you need. Thank you for your honesty. Suzanne

      January 18, 2012
  4. I love this post. Does Diane have her own blog that I can follow? Maybe the link is on here but I just can’t find it?? 🙂 LOL!

    February 14, 2012
    • Jocey, She does not, but I will tell her you asked. She will be honored. Hopefully, we can get her on here again. By the way, I love the music on your blog!

      February 14, 2012

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