Treasure The One — A Guest Post
You cannot be in the presence of Diane Butler without shedding many tears — some from laughing — some from crying. But mostly, you will not leave her company without first hearing the impact Jesus has had on her life. Diane is sharing a powerful story today of anger, control, forgiveness, mercy and redemption. I hope many are set free as we continue to address the fear of coming clean.
Here is her story:
There is a memory that continues to remind me of the power of forgiveness and the power God gives us to overcome sin in our lives — my precious little two-year-old (now 12) sitting on the toilet. We were in the middle of potty training, and she would not “go potty.” My heart breaks as I share this because it is not a proud moment. I just wanted her to go potty; I just remember “losing it.” I can see her little face looking at me as I screamed at her to “just go potty!” I began to rant and rave at this little innocent bystander to my lack of control. This pattern of anger continued for many years. When I couldn’t get the response I wanted, no one wanted to be in my path.
How do we hurt someone we treasure so much? The object of our heart must be Christ. If we don’t treasure the One who teaches us to love, the one we substitute in His place will take the wrath of our disappointment.
I loved my children so much, but they were having to do God’s job. They were having to make me feel loved, valued, accepted, respected, and when they didn’t, I let them know. It breaks my heart to think about it now. But what allows me to share is that I’m different; I have changed the object of my treasure. My treasure is Jesus! He has set me free from depending on my children to complete me, and I can’t even begin to explain how my home has changed. No one walks on eggshells anymore. My home is different, not because of something I did but because God poured out his great mercy and forgiveness through his Son, Jesus Christ. I am different because someone else had been transformed by Jesus, shared their story and through it, God revealed my sin to me.
I had known Jesus my whole life, but I refused to give him everything. I was enslaved to what I wanted, and they were good things, but they were not the prize of Jesus Himself. Because I was a slave to my lifestyle and my “stuff,” everyone else paid when life wasn’t going well for me. At the center of my story was ME, and what I finally understood was that God had to be the center of my story. Now, when my children disappoint me, I remember it’s not about me. When they make a bad choice, I remember it’s not about me. When they bring home a bad grade, I remember it’s not about me. I am free to love them, teach them, train them, but it is not my job to control.
I have a long way to go, and God has had to heal a lot of wounds in my children and me, but he is faithful.
The sin was easy to hide; it didn’t happen in public.
It was something I often wrote off as this is just who I am.
That was a lie.
I am so thankful God never gives up on us. Don’t hide in the shame of your sin. Bring it into the light so you can be who God says you are.
What lie is your sin holding you to?
Who/What is taking the wrath of your disappointment?